More than a year ago, I participated in a Q&A over at the Drinking Diaries website, which is a forum for women to share, vent, express, and discuss their drinking stories without judgment.
It was a fun experience and many wonderful comments came through, plus a couple people bluntly said they didn’t want to know the personal side of me—stick to professional writing and publishing advice, please.
So, fair warning, the Q&A veers away from professional writing advice. And so does the book I was asked to contribute to.
Drinking Diaries is an anthology of essays about women and drinking, edited by Leah Odze Epstein & Caren Osten Gerszberg, and published by Seal Press this month. I’m proud to say I’m a contributor, along with other remarkable women such as Jacquelyn Mitchard, Daphne Merkin, Kathryn Harrison, Ann Hood, Ann Leary, Pam Houston, Elissa Schappell, Asra Nomani, Priscilla Warner, Rita Williams, and Joyce Maynard.
My essay is dead last in the collection. Titled “Drinking as Genuine Vocation,” here’s a snippet from the middle:
I’ve always secretly thrilled at the thought that Alan Watts, a great enlightened person and spiritual teacher—admired by many—likely drank himself to death. I think it’s because alcohol helped him, like it helps me, focus on the ecstasy of what’s just right here, and to dig into the essence of life in this very moment, without the echo chamber of the mind going on and on and on. I feel more myself, without hang-ups, without getting stuck. I observe it all the more deeply and feel it all more acutely—and in this, perhaps I am like every other desperate writer, looking for the next remarkable thought.
William James said, “One of the charms of drunkenness unquestionably lies in the deepening sense of reality and truth which is gained therein. In whatever light things may then appear to us, they seem more utterly what they are, more ‘utterly utter’ than when we are sober.”
Drinking Diaries is now available as a paperback or e-book. Visit Amazon and read a sample chapter.

Jane Friedman has spent her entire career working in the publishing industry, with a focus on business reporting and author education. Established in 2015, her newsletter The Bottom Line provides nuanced market intelligence to thousands of authors and industry professionals; in 2023, she was named Publishing Commentator of the Year by Digital Book World.
Jane’s expertise regularly features in major media outlets such as The New York Times, The Atlantic, NPR, The Today Show, Wired, The Guardian, Fox News, and BBC. Her book, The Business of Being a Writer, Second Edition (The University of Chicago Press), is used as a classroom text by many writing and publishing degree programs. She reaches thousands through speaking engagements and workshops at diverse venues worldwide, including NYU’s Advanced Publishing Institute, Frankfurt Book Fair, and numerous MFA programs.





There’s something very endearing about this, it just makes me smile.
This is a tricky subject, drinking, and requires a certain amount of self-confidence and inner strength to approach. I admire the openness it took for everyone in the book to bring that project about, their willingness to bare a part of themselves that a lot of people will be uncomfortable with. Alcohol and other such substances have been used by creative types for milennia to loosen the shackles of their minds or to escape (for whatever reason). Personally, I wonder if many are able to keep from crossing the fine line of controlling or being consumed, and whether that final step of “loosening” would truly make the difference between writing something great or phenomenal. If truly phenomenal writing is inside you, it seems to me that surely it would only need to be set free once for the writer to realize it exists and to run with it. I guess it depends on how internally uptight you are. At any rate, kudos to all!
Thanks for the thoughtful comment, Terry! Indeed, the entire anthology is pretty incredible in its honesty—and in the range of experiences it presents.
I love your honest and positive approach to this subject which is often so feared, maligned and abused at least in American culture.
Yes, it’s nice to take guilt, fear, and shame out of the equation.
My copy has shipped, and I can’t wait!
Thanks, Darrelyn. 🙂
Very interesting snippet. Insightful. I’ve always lived in places like Salt Lake City and Bible belt. Didn’t start drinking until nearly 30. I do it alone or with one trusted friend who I know will help me gain the most from the experience. If I get hung in a manuscript during the day it almost always works itself out with some booze at night as i gain insight into the characters. I think it is the “utterly utter.”
Ditto for me — not until 30.
It’s lunchtime. I should order my three martinis now, if I want to be my best for the end of the day…
Very interesting. I loved the William James quote. Also loved your line about writers looking for the next remarkable thought–that’s us!
Yep, the whole essay kind of started with that kernel, in fact!
I read more of your essay on Amazon and so totally relate to it. I will enjoy reading it on Kindle tonight!
Thanks for reading!
Excellent. I will order the book and locate the website. Will now write my own drinking story, too. Thanks.
Yes! You might consider DrinkingDiaries.com too:
http://www.drinkingdiaries.com/2012/08/31/readers-share-their-fascinating-stories/
Your one of my friends I haven’t met.